Hey Aaron,
These are some good points you made in your post.As far as JVs are concerned, the formula "Give Before You Take" always applies.

Most of the accompolished maketers value long term partnerships more than upfront commissions.They would prefer a person who can help them with their own product launches and that is why marketers with big mailing lists get JV partners so easily.

That said,there is nothing like an "inner circle" in IM.Even newbies can get big name marketers promoting their products if they follow the below formula:

1)Build a mailing list.You can use article marketing,Forum marketing or PPC(if you can afford) for that purpose.The basic idea is to build a subscribers list having at least a couple thousand prospects.

2)Increase your list size by doing adswaps.These swaps will not only increase your list size but also help you in getting JV partners.

3)In the meantime,provide as much value to your subscribers as you can.Providing quality content for free is the ultimate way to win over your prospects.

4)Once you have 5,000+ subscribers,participate in a couple of big launches and register your presence in the JV leaderboard.Once you succeed in doing that,there will be no difficulty in getting JV partners.
Thanks,
Vivek