Wow... Lost of questions.

As far as scripts go... JVManagerpro is a good one for membership sites.
If you just want to do affiliate sales through something like clickbank, then easyclickmate is an excellent resource.

a 30K list would be a good sized list, but like Sam says it has to convert.
There are some big hitters here and you can always talk to Mike (the forum owner) he can put you in touch with the guys you want to talk to.

I have some pretty good programmers but they are busy on a project of mine. I'd be happy to turn you on to them when they finish in November.

I don';t know any software programmers per se.

Good luck and welcome to the foprum.

Darrin